Monday, May 26, 2008

Ten More Things Labs CANNOT Do!

In addition to the ten things I listed in my first post about Ten Things a Lab CANNOT Do you, dear readers, revealed several additional impossibilities for Labs (submitted in the comments section).

Here's a summary of your additions to my original list. Labs can't...
  • remain resting in a room if you leave the room
  • refrain from a full-out-barrel-race to the door if they think you're going out
  • resist the call of the ice maker (or freezer door or ice cubes being rummaged out of the ice cube box)
  • NOT be the center of attention, especially when a baby comes to visit
  • ignore any stuffed toy, anywhere, anytime
  • wag their tails slowly, softly, and gently
  • forget people they like
  • ignore a human lap or un-shoed human feet, particularly in winter
  • drink in a tidy, genteel, dainty manner (think Elizabeth Post here)
  • keep their tongues in their mouths (Elizabeth would be mortified!)

Yup, yup, and yup again.

Yes, indeed-ee, Labs do have their limitations. So in keeping with the last list (and the additional cannot-dos from your comments there), here are ten more things Labs CANNOT do:

1. Be mean. Even to cats. They just don't have a mean bone in their collective bodies.

2. Reject human touch. They thrive on it.

3. Pay no attention to arriving guests or strangers, particularly if there's a gate or door through which said persons must pass.

4. Hold on to their hair (we're in shed mode here again). As Larry the Cucumber (Veggie Tales) would say (adapted, of course):

Oh wh-e-r-e is the dogbrush?
Oh wh-e-r-e is the dogbrush?
Oh where oh where oh where oh where oh wh-e-r-e...
is the dog brush?

(For an answer to this imponderable, look at Pinot's Puppy Antics from a few days ago.)

5. Stay trim if they don't exercise (gee, sound familiar?).

6. Wait for a treat without drooling (Baxter is our King of Drool).

7. Refuse a walk or the opportunity to train. Again, anytime, anywhere, in any circumstance.

8. Keep their own ears clean.

9. Resist our stinky socks, shoes, or dirty underwear (I'll spare you the photo illustrations!). ;o)

10. Miss the crumbs we leave on laps, sweaters, floors, and facial hair.

Yes, our Labs do have their limitations. But theirs are limitations I can live with.

How about you? Any more?

Comment away!

'Til next time,


Mary said...

Labs can not let someone sleep in if they are awake and want to play. They also can not walk by a mud puddle with out jumping in or chase a squirrel if said squirrel is in their yard or the neighbors. The list is long and distinguished.

Nikki Kenagy said...

About the shedding thing...FYI, I am loving my "Furminator". A bit expensive, but it really gets the fur off of our lab Belle. Yeah she still sheds, but most of the loose stuff is gone.
Going to miss Baxter Boos...he is my favorite.

ShawnandLaci said...

resist the urge for people food is another one. We have troubles with that one here at our house.

Shawna and Laci

Meesh said...

A lab will never NOT worm their way into your heart and wind you tightly around their dew claw!
-Chester's mom